


AS- After Seventeen.

by orphan_account



Category: Heathers (1988)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Heathers, F/F, Fluff, mcnamawyer - Freeform, modern heathers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-29
Updated: 2017-06-14
Packaged: 2018-10-25 11:02:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,973
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10762941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Veronica Sawyer, Heather McNamara, Betty Finn, Martha Dunnstock, and Heather Duke are experiencing life After Seventeen- feeling free- but not quite. Both Heathers have dangerous secrets- and there's some unfinished business at Westerburg.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> so this is like one of my first fics... and its McNamawyer.. I think I spelled that right.. well I hope you enjoy it! (It starts a week after the song seventeen reprise happens.) also, my posting schedule will be like once or twice a day on weekends and its sketchy over the week. So yeah, enjoy.

One  
It was the first week of freedom, and Veronica Sawyer was loving it. Freedom meant (almost) no cliques (at least not in her world, she was avoiding the other, greener Heather at all costs((Because Duke, Chandler, Kurt, Ram, and JD had basically been the fundamentals for hierarchy(((A follower, a queen bee, two god-awful jocks and a rebel((((God bless and Rest in Peace.)))) and no boyfriends and no not watching movies with Martha on Fridays, and Veronica was loving those three things more than she’d ever loved anything before- more than croquet, more than JD, more than Heather’s shiny car, and even more than the Princess Bride. “Ronnie?” Veronica’s head snapped up to face wide blue eyes, a mass of blonde hair, and a whole lot of yellow. “Sorry, Mac,” she said, pulling her books together, strapping them into her book bag. “What were you saying?” Mac (Or Heather, Or Mcnamara) shoved a brightly painted finger into her mouth, chewing off the tiny rine that was left from her incessant biting. “Duke,” the other girl whispered. “Twelve-o-clock.” Sure enough, when Veronica looked forward, there was Heather Duke, now sporting a bright red bow and (as always) green makeup, making her look rather like a bleeding christmas tree. She was glaring at Veronica. “Hiiii, Heather,” Veronica said. (So much for avoiding.) “How’re you- How’re you doing.” Heather glared back. “Great, actually. How’s the fattie and the pathetic day-glo cheerleader?” She sneered at Mcnamara, who was fidgeting while she pretended to do homework. Veronica smiled brightly, flashing a mouth full of braces. “They’re great too!” She grabbed Mcnamara’s arm (not noticing the bright flush that appeared when she did) and began steering her away. “Well you have a lovely week!” And once they were completely, totally out of Duke’s eye or ear range, Mac chose to speak. “I hope your week isn’t lovely!” And as it turned out, neither of their weeks were.  
*  
“Freedom” wasn’t the word to describe Heather’s current world, though, she thought as she walked arm in arm with Veronica, trying to make her flush go away as V chattered about Martha making plans for them to watch a bunch of classics Friday Night. More like, constant blushing anger at both Duke and her crush on Veronica. The latter hadn’t seemed to guess it yet- but it was only a matter of time, wasn’t it. Mac internally face-palmed, probably getting a lot of borrowed pink lipstick smeared on her hand. “Do you want to eat in the cafeteria?” Veronica asked, pulling out her phone. “Or we can eat out. What do you have after lunch period?” Mac blushed again (UGH) and stuttered- “Um- I think a study hall? How- how about you?” Veronica smiled. “English! But the teacher doesn’t care if I’m late, so if we drive to B&N and be back at a reasonable time!” The pair only ate at Barnes and Nobles- Veronica said it was because she liked their peanut butter cookies, but Mac knew she just liked the manga section. Heather’s guilty secret- well, one of her guilty secrets was coloring books- not stupid barn animal ones or whatever, as if- but the ones filled with spiraling designs and intricate symmetrical patterns. Sometimes she spent hours just tracing them with her pencil- and then she would, little by little, fill the page with colors. “Mac? Earth to Macccccccc,” Veronica said robotically. She tapped on her friend’s head, causing the latter’s face to color once more. “Goddamnit,” Heather muttered as she tucked back a curl, Veronica now skipping ahead to unlock her car. “You have to practice for your permit!” V called back, dangling the keys. “Now that all your other rides to school are dead and I’m as lazy as hell, you’re going to have to learn sooner or later!”


	2. Barnes and Nobles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> BETTY FINN

They were standing in the line for the Barnes and Noble cafe when Veronica saw her. She tapped Heather on the shoulder. “Betty Finn, coming towards us” she whispered. “Don’t let her see me.” Heather nodded and fluffed her mass of blonde hair. “Maybe my lustrous locks will hide you,” she tittered, and when Veronica laughed she turned pink. Betty Finn had been Veronica and Martha’s best friend for a long time, until Veronica turned “emo” and Martha became uncool. She’d gone off and become a prep, and Veronica hadn’t seen her in months. Well, she supposed, it’s not like she would be hanging around the Heathers. She strained her mind to recall translucent pink glasses and wavy brown hair. “Ron?” Heather said. “Peanut butter or chocolate chip?” “PEANUT BUTTER,” Veronica said, temporarily forgetting Betty and salivating as the cookie, perfectly brown, glowed through the display glass. “Wanna split a roast beef?” Heather said, fumbling with her wallet as the person in front of them ordered. “Sure, but I’ll pay for it.” Veronica pulled out her own wallet and counted out the money, not noticing Heather staring at her, pink mouth frozen in a silent o. “Oh, o-kay, um-” “Well, if it isn’t Veronica Sawyer!” Veronica whirled around. “Holy shit,” Heather whispered, peering at the sundress clad, beaming Betty Finn from her position behind Veronica. “Betty,” Veronica said, stepping forward awkwardly. The other girl trotted towards her, grabbed her face, and kissed both cheeks without really touching her ex-friend’s face. “Long time no see!” she said. Veronica nodded. “Well, um, I’ve been pretty busy. As you, and everyone else, probably noticed, I was a Heather! Well, I’m a Veronica, but y’know-” Betty’s eyes seemed to bulge even further as her head bobbled up and down. “Yeah! Actually, I’m friends with Heather Duke-” Mac made a gagging sound “-and she’s um, pretty nice!” Betty visibly strained to come up with nice things to say about her, and clutched her book close. “Moby Dick,” Veronica smirked. “I’ve had my fair share of trouble with that one, and, as I recall, Heather has too.”  
*  
Mac stared at the cover of Betty Finn’s book. The whale’s fins flipping to catch the boats, to smash the people. She remembered when Duke had hosted a “Heathers Book Club” when they were thirteen- that was when she had glasses, green framed wiry ones that Chandler would tease her about. And Duke had made them all read Moby Dick- well, she made Mac read it. No one told Chandler what to do, but the latter played along anyway. Mac still had nightmares about that giant whale, and before, before everything was fixed, it had felt- she shivered- it had felt like Mac was in a little boat- and Moby Dick with a stolen red scrunchie wrapped around her tail was going to flip Heather right overboard. “I read it,” she murmured. Veronica turned around. “Huh? Oh, Betty, this is my- friend, you probably know her- Heather Mcnamara.” Heather waved slightly, then resorted to biting her nails. “So, you come here often- during, um, lunch period,” Veronica continued the conversation as the cashier handed Heather the change and receipt. Betty shook her head. “I’m, actually, just stopping by. Heather..Duke I mean.. She told me I should read this. She’s actually- pretty nerdy.” Her voice dropped on the last two words, and they stood in awkward silence for about a minute, Mac tense and still facing the cashier, Veronica’s brows raised and her braces bared in a grimace, and Betty Finn’s eyes narrowed as she appeared to inspect a piece of lint on her jeans. “Well!” Veronica said as Mac was handed their food. “Nice seeing you, Betty-” The girl looked up and smiled a little sadly. “Sorry for calling you emo, all those years ago,” she said, and shrugged a little. “And Martha… she was a good friend.” Veronica nodded and took the plate of cookies from McNamara. Once they were in the manga aisle, Mac pretty sure that they were breaking the code of conduct by eating in the non-cafe zone, she asked what she’d been dying to for like, ten minutes. “What happened between you two?” she said tentatively, picking at her nail polish. “Well, remember- when I abandoned Martha for the three of you?” Veronica said, peeling a shiny volume off the shelf and peering intently at the Japanese words on the back. “She kind of- did that to us a couple years ago. And now, I guess she’s friends with Duke.” She sighed, and Mac had a sudden urge to hold V’s hand. She satisfied herself with an awkward pat on the head. “It’s funny how things always come back to haunt you,” Veronica said, looking up. “Yeah,” Mac said distantly, her mind on much more than girls with glasses and brown hair. “Isn’t it.”


	3. thoughts

Veronica shuffled through the hall, dragging her heels as she thought about the encounter with Betty Finn. And Duke, with her sharp words and black hair had snuck in and snatched another one of the opportunities for a good junior year- Just when happiness, just when a sense of peace had appeared, of course a Heather had to ruin it- well, of course a Heather and an honorary "Veronica" type. She shook her head and unlocked her locker. "Veronica!" The girl spun at Martha's voice and embraced her friend. "How was PT?" She said, gesturing at Martha's still damaged condition after breaking some bones in a suicide attempt. Martha smiled tightly. "It was okay. How's your day been?" Veronica grinned. "Oh, you wouldn't believe who me and Mac bumped into today," Martha's face froze when Veronica mentioned Heather, but the latter didn't notice and continued. "Betty Finn. The Betty Finn!" Martha raised her eyebrows. "The "you're too emo, you're too uncool" Betty Finn?" Veronica nodded. "And you know Mac, she's always so nervous, she had never met Betty Finn, and guess what, guess what-"  
"You befriended another one of our tormentors there on the spot?" Martha retorted dryly, giving a sharp tug on her ponytail as she glared at the bulletin board behind V's head. Veronica stared. "Wha-what?" Martha's eyes widened. "I can't believe I said that. Sorry. Continue." She flicked her eyes to stare at her sneakers. "Uh, okay," Veronica said, making a mental note to muse over Martha's sudden anger later. "And it turns out, um, that she's friends with Heather Duke!" Martha gave a little yelp and twirled a strand of brown hair around her finger. "No," Martha leaned a little closer. "Are they making a new Heathers clique?" she said in a conspirator's whisper. Veronica's eyes widened in turn. "You think so?" She finally finished organizing her books in the locker. "Oh, I doubt it," she said, and then, as an afterthought, she said, "We both know that Duke hasn't got the guts to be a Chandler," she said, and Martha chuckled nervously. But did she? Veronica thought as she watched the girl's head from her seat behind her in class. "Maybe," she whispered to herself, "Maybe we've all been changed,"  
*  
Mac sat on the covered toilet seat, her face in her hands. Don't like Veronica. Don't like Veronica, she thought. All of this nonsense was too much for her. She had to remember her checklist she'd made at the start of the year, and follow that as best as possible. She mentally reviewed. 

-Stay out of Chandler's way (*chokes*)  
-Stay out of Duke's way (Still applicable)  
-Be friends with the new girl Veronica (Still applicable)  
-DON'T LIKE THE NEW GIRL VERONICA (STILL APPLICABLE)  
-Stay out of Ram's way (pew pew)  
-Stay out of Kurt's way (pew pew)  
-Don't talk to Veronica's boyfriend (Kaboom)  
-Be a nicer person (Still applicable)  
-Die (Veronica confiscated your vitamins)  
-Be seventeen (Still applicable)  
-DON'T LIKE VERONICA

Mac opened her eyes. She might need to add a few things, but, so far so good. At least half the people on the list were dead. Even though she felt immediately guilty thinking that, oh well. She grabbed her pile of books and was walking into class when she looked up to see Betty Finn entering the sliding doors. She walked away before she could think about her. Mostly because the only thing she'd thought the first time she saw the girl was that she was pretty. Really, really pretty.  
Dammit.


	4. Abandoned Memories

Veronica, fists pressing into her face, leaned forward and used one of her hands to tap Mac on the shoulder. Flustered, the blonde whipped her head around, crimson. "What?" Veronica shrugged. "I'm so bored." Heather cringed. "Finish your test." Veronica heard a snort and turned to see Duke laughing at them from her seat in the back of the class, making a duck face as she traced a heart in the air. Veronica narrowed her eyes. 'What?" She mouthed, and the Asian shrugged, looking back at her paper, her mouth still fixed in a menacing smirk. "So I figured we should include- Er- Martha in our plans more often," Veronica whispered at the back of Heather's head. It had been two days since the Betty Finn fiasco, and now that they'd encountered once, Betty and Veronica seemed to be prone to colliding in the halls some way or another- Betty would drop her book and Veronica would trip over it (invoking cackling from Duke and a guilty look from Betty, Veronica would fumble with her locker combination and Betty would walk past with a half hearted smile.   
Heather didn't budge, and Veronica poked her again. "Heather, Heather, Heather, Heather, Heather, Heather-" "Veronica," Mac whirled, slamming her book onto the table. She composed herself. "Martha Dunnstock hates me. And she will always hate me. And I deserve it!" Veronica noticed how she refused to look at Duke, probably snickering in the corner. "No- Everybody loves you-" Veronica bumbled. Mac shook her head. "Everybody loved Chandler."  
She stuck her face close to Veronica's, despite the blush creeping back over her cheeks. "And you killed her. "  
*  
Heather couldn't believe she'd done that too Veronica. She couldn't believe that she'd gone that far. She'd seen something die in her eyes- and then she'd looked back on her test, leaving Heather stupidly staring at her still. "God, Veronica, I'm so-" Veronica looked up, her face full of barely concealed sorrow. "No- my fault." Heather leaned back and bit her lip. Veronica had-kept bugging her, continuing to pretend like their friendship, Heather and Martha's friendship, Heather and Heather's friendship, hell, Heather and Veronica's friendship wasn't just one big fat lie. Heather shuddered, looking out of the corner her eye at Duke, who was smiling right at her. She mimed heartbreak and Heather froze. How- How did she know about her crush? Noone knew- No one knew-   
But wasn't she so obvious?  
Heather feigned ignorance and turned back around, looking at her test although the numbers were a blur, trying not to turn around to first apologize to Veronica formally and then punch Duke in her surgery altered nose.   
"Hey," Heather said, grabbing her book and walking up to Veronica. Veronica smiled, a fake, sugary beam that Mac hadn't seen her use since the days of Chandler. "I'm so sorry, V, I can't even believe-" Veronica smiled again, this one even bigger than the last. "No! I'm serious-" Her voice cracked as the superficial smile disappeared. "I was just stupid to think this was all real. I thought Chandler and JD and everyone else were just abandoned memories- No I didn't, I don't know what I thought-" Mac nodded. "I'm not sure of anything anymore."


	5. Not-so forgotten

Veronica mentally cursed herself, slamming her locker shut. You killed her, You killed her, You killed her, the words reverberated over and over in her head, the makeshift bandage she'd hastily patched over those people ripping off as she realized that the makeshift bandage hadn't ever existed and she was living in a world that was minus four people, four people she could've saved, four people she could've stopped and- "Veronica?" She looked up to see a tentatively smiling Mac. "You-you okay? Again, I really don't know what came over me-" Veronica shook her head for the millionth time. "I'm okay. Just sick of Duke and everything and y'know," She forced a laugh, and Mac slowly nodded. "Um, do you wanna do something?" The blonde said, tucking a curl behind her ear and shifting on her feet, other fist pressed into her cheerleading skirt. No, She thought, racking her brain for an excuse. "Um, don't you have practice?" Mac looked confused for a second before her eyes widened. "Shit-" She checked her watch. "Uhm, you can watch if you'd like," Heather said, pulling down her duffel bag from her locker opposite Veronica's. Veronica nodded. "Oh- okay." They raced for the field. It was the first time Veronica had been out there since last week- the day JD had died, a bloody finger pancaked into the ground at Veronica's feet. She shuddered, the cold air picking up a strand of Mac's hair and floating it around, the latter anxiously pulling her locks into a ponytail. Veronica made to sit at the bleachers but-  
Blood. Dust. Dead. "People were saying you killed yourself," "You look like hell," The buzz, the clamor, and JD dead, dead dead dead dead dead "Our love is god," "Say hi to god," and just watching, watching, watching, watching-  
As Mac ran to join the squad, her hair bouncing as she jogged, like it always had, before they knew each other, before before, Before Veronica was a Veronica- before she'd met JD, known Chandler, been noticed by Ram and Kurt.  
Four lives.  
Gone.  
*  
That practice, Heather was dangerously aware of Veronica's eyes on her as she worked through the drills, captained her squad, warmed up. One of the girls walked up to her snidely- Kat Anderson- and smirked. "That your girlfriend?" She pointed, and the two of them turned to look at Veronica, her brown eyes fixated on the field as the cool air blew her waves of brown hair this way and that. "What? No," Heather forced a snort. "Are you forgetting that I dated Kurt for a year?" She said, crossing her arms, hoping, praying she'd pass the scrutiny of the sneering redhead. "Dated? Sure." The girl turned around. "Later, Mac," Heather bent to tie her shoe, heart racing. First Duke, now this. Great. Soon, she'd be known as the formerly popular suicidal lesbian. She shuddered. Shit, shit shit. And Veronica was upset. Her week was going fan freaking tastic. She tried to focus for the rest of practice, but her mind was on the bleachers and the damaged girl sitting on them. After practice, she ran back up and snapped her finger in front of Veronica's face. "What?" V said, swatting her away. "Some girl thought you were my girlfriend," She said, smiling. "Fancy that," Veronica said, and Heather was relieved that she smiled faintly.  
On the way back to the school, Veronica was silent. Finally, though, she spoke as they exited the building entirely, walking towards her car. "Do you- do you ever think about them?" Mac knew who she was talking about. "Yeah." She examined a mangled cuticle. "Chandler was the only one who- who was like a friend. And Ram and Kurt- I don't know. I didn't- I didn't really know JD all that well though." Veronica scuffed her shoe into the parking lot gravel. "I do," She said, unlocking the car and climbing into the passengers seat. "It's like they're here, y'know?" Heather nodded, and instinctively looked to the left. "Heather's car isn't even parked in four spots at once anymore," she said, turning on the ignition. "Everything's just... wrong."


	6. Find Duke

Veronica stared at the wall.   
Martha was talking, talking about the fanart of Buttercup and Wesley she'd seen on Pinterest, talking about how Legally Blonde 2 was a load of shit, tentatively brushing a strand of mouse brown hair behind her ear and saying how Ram and never once expressed an interest in those kinds of movies, but maybe now that he was- swallow- gay he would, and so much more, so many things to talk about, things that Veronica, at the moment, couldn't hear. "Um, sorry, Marth- Marthie, Martha," her voice caught on the syllables of the old awkward nicknames she'd given her best friend. She scuffed her converse into the ground. "I- have to go. Fourth period. Math." Martha nodded, her wide, dark eyes watching Veronica walk away. Veronica took pride in her math skills, actually. She'd actually tutored Chandler for a week before the bitch had thrown a hissy fit over integers and got so drunk that she'd skipped school for two days- Veronica felt the corners of her mouth twitch up at the memory, but quickly forced them down. Disgusting. Smiling over a dead girl. The mood that Veronica was in was a fog between sadness and anger and not caring. She'd thought she was over it, she wasn't. She wasn't. Had she thought that? She couldn't remember. She shook her head and kept walking. Math, fourth period, Math, fourth period, MATH, FOURTH PERIOD- Math fourth period, in which Veronica had Heather Duke as a project partner- a hasty arrangement made two months ago while Chandler reigned and Veronica was desperate to latch onto Duke’s coolness, her beauty, and had only found hardness and sneering. But now, even as instinct leadened her legs and made her want to walk far, far away from math, fourth period, her mind reminded her that Duke was the only person that hadn’t changed. And then Veronica’s limbs remembered too, and she walked, and walked, and then, appearing from behind a pillar- "Hey, Ron!" And then there was Mac, tentatively beaming and slightly swaying as she clutched her books to her chest as she always did, her fair hair bouncing. Veronica, irritated that her conquest had been halted, rolled her eyes. “Hello, Heather. You’d think that the twenty four hours we already spend together would be enough, but no. So, Hello.” She paused, and when Heather couldn’t collect herself enough to reply, she walked on. To duke, her mind said. To hell with everything else, because Duke. She will be a bitch, and that will be enough of the past to bring me back to being Veronica Sawyer.   
*  
Heather walked outside and sat on a bench. And the words came crashing back. Baby, a voice in her head taunted. Big, big, baby. She realized the voice was Veronica's at the same time she realized Veronica would never say something like that. "Oh," she said softly, staring at her lap. Maybe she didn't need to be with Veronica all the time. God, that sounded wrong. Maybe they didn't need to hang out anymore. Maybe, they should just be friends. Maybe Mac should forget about her crush once and for all. Maybe Mac should just die, was the afterthought. Where had Veronica been going? Maybe she had a boyfriend again. "Oh," she whispered again, and got up. I have school today, her mind hummed. You've had three periods already, just a few to go. Buzz, buzz. Maybe the buzzing was the drowning. Drowning in the reality of it all. She walked, knowing that the worst thing she could do was think about Veronica again, see Veronica again. But she poked her head into that math class, and she saw the teacher teaching it, and she saw Veronica look up with nothing in her eyes. Nothing. Their gazes met, and Mac thought she caught a hint of sorrow in V's eyes, and then she looked down again, and Mac walked away, and Heather's day continued, her mind never wavering from the image of Veronica's books mixed with Duke's, Duke biting her lip with a smile as she looked at Veronica, and Veronica's hand half an inch away from Heather's, and Mac just standing at the door like the pathetic baby she was.


End file.
